Awesome! I've been waiting for some good news. What is it, Bruce? The suspense is killing me!"The news is almost all good for Chicago Cubs fans with the team now in possession of new owner and chairman of the board Tom Ricketts."
OK, that is really only good news for you as a member of the media, but you're building to something, I can tell. I bet it's going to be REALLY good news."Ricketts will start the process of revealing his long-term and short-term plans on Friday with a news conference at Wrigley Field, where he'll begin his one-on-one interviews with the press followed by a full day of TV and radio one-on-ones."
Bruce, I have to tell you, that does not sound how one would expect to hear good news being delivered. The phrases "turbulent economy" and "economic concessions from the fans" should not appear in any lead-in to what we would consider good news. You might as well also include the phrases "anal cancer," "five-state kill spree," and "towel drill" in your lead-in."Hard facts of a turbulent economy and a veteran-laden roster dictate some economic concessions from the fans and baseball operations in 2010, according to sources with knowledge of the situation."
I see, the good news is that the ticket price increase will merely be "slight," instead of "gargantuan" or "enormous." That is fantastic news. I'm going to start working on my "Only a Slight Ticket Price Increase Jig" right now."A slight raise in ticket prices can not be avoided as built-in costs and spending projections continue to mount. Over the past two seasons under Sam Zell and tribune Co., ticket prices increased over 30 percent across the board. That amount included a 23 percent raise after the 2008 season."
Well, that was kind of good news in 2007, but I'm not sure how that does me any good for this year. Maybe it's good news that the Cubs were merely "under-performing," "flat," and "disappointing" this year instead of "horrendous." To be honest, you're kind of stretching that definition of "good" though, Bruce."Ticket prices were frozen for 2007 after a horrendous season in which the Cubs lost over 90 games."
I know! Maybe the good news is that the ticket prices are going up so that the Cubs can afford to take on some additional payroll if necessary to keep the window of opportunity open for one more year. Bruce, you sly dog! You had me going there.
Bruce, I'm going to come right out and say this is definitely NOT good news. I mean, this is not even technically, news. We've pretty much suspected as much all along, but being right all along doesn't make it good news."According to major league sources, the Cubs' payroll will be locked in at close to $140 million, the same that was spent in 2009.
In order for the team's baseball operations department to have flexibility with this payroll, the Cubs will have to be creative and make trades that ware in the framework of the $140 million figure."
Wait, I thought the Cubs couldn't take on any more big contracts. Is the good news that you've been kidding up until now?"General manager Jim Hendry and his baseball department have been working on trades with Tampa, Toronto and three or four other clubs with players with big contracts that they would like to move."
Ohhhh, trading a talented player on the roster for a player that is white, has less talent, is more media-friendly, and has a similar salary is the good news. That is probably more good news for you, but not so much for us who will be paying more money to watch the more friendly Pat Burrell strike out alot and not catch fly balls that are hit anywhere not directly at him.
Well, that is actually more than Milton Bradley makes, so in theory, the Cubs would need to unload more than just Milton Bradley's contract to afford Vernon Wells. Maybe the good news is that the Cubs will soon be parting with Milton Bradley AND Carlos Zambrano! I'm getting my champagne ready."Toronto will talk to anyone who will take outfielder Vernon Wells off its hands. Wells has a multi-year contracts that pays close to $15 million per year."
Bruce, this is the last paragraph of your post and not only does it offer no information that is relevant to the Cubs at all, it still comes no where close to qualifying as good news. Maybe the good news is that your post about all the good things Cubs fans have in store isn't longer."Toronto at some point will be looking at moving ace right-hander Roy Halladay. It's unknown at this point if the Cubs will be involved. Halladay is one season from free agency."