Here Comes the American League

Today is the day that interleague play begins for the Cubs. Interleague play is the best thing that baseball has ever come up with because otherwise, Cubs fans would have to rely solely on MLB.TV, the MLB Network, MLB Extra Innings, ESPN, TBS, Fox, or NBC to see Jason Kubel hit or Kevin Slowey pitch.

I'm particularly pissed off at interleague play this year because this is the year that the NL Central plays the AL Central, so I am going to have to root for the White Sox quite a bit this year. This fact is slapping me in the face this weekend as I travel up to Milwaukee for an annual tailgate party and baseball game. Some years, we get lucky and catch the Cubs up there, but usually it's the Brewers against some random team that I could care less about, but for whom, on that one day, I am their biggest fan.

I hate the Mets, but if they are playing the Brewers: Go Mets! If the Brewers are languishing in last place, and they are playing the Cardinals: Go Brewers! Whatever the situation, my allegiance in the game is determined entirely by what outcome benefits the Cubs the most.

This year, the Brewers are playing the White Sox. I have to cheer on that fat, inbred, bleached out, fat (yeah, I said it twice) f---, Bobby Jenks. I have to get behind A. J. Pierzynski and hope he starts a fight with Ryan Braun that leads to multiple suspensions. Now Scott "I've Never Hit a Homerun in My Entire Life, Except to Walk-Off in the World Series" Podsednik is back with the team? I want to kill myself.

I'm sure the Astros will trade Geoff Blum back to the White Sox for the weekend to complete my horror.

It will be interesting to see how I react to the game as it plays out. I don't like the Brewers much, and they certainly hate the Cubs fans invading their ballpark every year, so I assume I will hear a few things from Brewers fans that are sober enough to realize that I'm wearing a Cubs hat. But, man do I hate the White Sox.

I thought my feelings over having every little break go in their favor in 2005 would have numbed by now, but it hasn't. I'm pissed off now even thinking about the doubleplay ball through Graffanino's legs, the lost flyball bouncing off of Grady Sizemore's hip, the dropped third strike, and every other boost the gods decided to give the White Sox in their championship quest whenever they started tightening up.

Go White Sox. I just threw up in my mouth a little.