The news of the day surrounds Alfonso Soriano's knee and how it is still not 100% after season-ending surgery last September. As Bruce Levine reports:
"I don't feel 100 percent because I'm not running 100 percent," Soriano said on Monday. "I'm just running 75 to 80 percent, and I don't feel nothing that hurts. When I start running 100 percent I want to know how it feels."
Way to kill the happy buzz left over from the MOST TREMENDOUSLY TREMENDOUS HOCKEY GAME EVER PLAYED IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD!!!! Now, when people ask where I was during the Improbability on Ice, all I'll remember is that it was shortly before I found out that Soriano didn't report to camp ready to sprint around the bases at full speed on his first day after five whole months of rest and rehabilitation. I am barely able to type as I lie here in a fetal position.
Meanwhile, Carrie Muskat is reporting that the Cubs asked Soriano not to fully run on his knee during the offseason to avoid setbacks. So if he hasn't run on it, how is he gauging that percentage of recuperation?:
"I say in my mind I'm 80 percent but that's because I'm not doing anything like playing in the field," he said. "When I test it, I hope my knee feels better than I think. I think it's 85 percent. Maybe when I test it, it's 100 percent."
Oh.
When I read that, my brain processed: "Blah blah blah blah blah blah," he said. "Blah blah blah blah. Blah blah. Blah blah blah, it's 100 percent." So, there you have it. All better.
That was close.
Up next: Flipping out about Aramis Ramirez's shoulder.
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