You know how Yankees fans don't consider some of their best players "real Yankees" until they pass the clutch test a few times? Alex Rodriguez was putting up unreal numbers when he arrived in New York, but a few high-pressure pop-ups or groundouts led to grumblings that he was not a real Yankee. The same thing happened to Mark Teixiera and any number of other players who have worn the pinstripes in the Bronx. To be a real Yankee, you better damn well hit a few walk-offs on national TV, or you are just a poser who doesn't deserve to wear the NY on the cap.
The Cubs have an opposite situation going. New players can't really be considered part of the rich history of embarassingly bad baseball until they have that moment when they do something so off-the-charts ridiculous, you wouldn't believe it actually happened except for the fact that it happens all the time to the Chicago National League Ballclub.
Some players become real Cubs almost instantly. Milton Bradley got ejected after striking out looking in his first at-bat of the season after returning from an injury he sustained in an at-bat in which he walked. Here's your Cubbie patch, Milton.
Some Cubs take awhile to realize they are Cubs. Mark Prior didn't become a real Cub until he injured himself plowing into Marcus Giles while running the bases. Here's your Cubbie patch, Mark.
God bless him, Starlin Castro tried his damndest to hold off becoming a real Cub, but he became a Cub in his ninth inning at-bat against the Brewers on Tuesday. The play started well enough. He singled up the middle to drive in Mike Fontenot to bring the Cubs within one run. He then saw a slight bobble in the outfield by Jim Edmonds and decided to try to stretch it into a double.
That is when things went horribly wrong. He ended up channeling his inner Theriot and stumbled as he tried to accelerate halfway between first and second, and he was caught. He got run down and ended up being tagged for the second out as he tried to sprawl around Rickie Weeks.
Welcome to the club, Starlin! You're a real Cub today! Here's your Cubbie patch.
Someone kill me.